Dating Violence...

As a former teacher, I would be saddened to watch teen relationships sometimes.  Girls would like it when a guy treated them as a possession...It was a source of pride to be called their boyfriends "bitch", etc.  I would watch one person in a relationship alienate the other person in the relationship from their friends and sometimes family.  It would sadden me because they could not grasp the fact that they were still children and high school is for learning and making memories that you can never go back and redo.  What a depressing situation.

Dating violence can happen to any teen regardless of gender, race, socio-economic status, or whether or not they have experience with dating.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 1 in 4 adolescents experiences verbal, physical, emotional, or sexual abuse from a dating partner each year.

  

This issue is so serious that several states have passed laws requiring schools to address the issue.

Recognizing Dating Violence

Dating violence includes any behavior by a dating partner that is used to manipulate, gain control, gain power; make a person feel bad about himself or herself; or make a person afraid of his or her boyfriend or girlfriend.

The Consequences of Dating Violence

Dating violence can have serious consequences. While the immediate impact might be humiliation and/or physical pain, young people who experience abuse are more likely to be in physical fights or bring weapons to school. They might exhibit higher rates of drug and alcohol abuse as well as high-risk sexual behaviors. Targets of abuse are also more likely to contemplate or attempt suicide.

Boys and Girls and Abuse

Research shows that both girls and boys carry out aggression in relationships and that girls are more likely than boys to initiate physical aggression toward their dating partner. For 2003, the CDC found that 8.8 percent of girls and 8.9 percent of boys reported physical violence from a dating partner during the last 12 months.

Girls tend to stay in a relationship after being injured by dating violence. Also, girls suffer serious injuries such as broken bones or cuts more often than do boys.
Impact of Dating Violence

Research shows a number of effects, both short and long-term as a result of dating violence.

Abusive experiences during adolescent dating relationships may interfere with normal development of self esteem and body image. Victims of dating violence have increased risk for injury, and are more likely to use alcohol and drugs, practice unhealthy weight control behaviors, experience general poor health, engage in risky sexual behavior, become pregnant, or engage in suicidal behavior.

Finally, psychological abuse early in a relationship is linked to later physical abuse in adult relationships.

Abusers’ Risk Factors

Adolescents who become abusive in a dating relationship have several characteristics in common. The following risk factors make it more likely that they will carry out physical, sexual, or emotional dating violence:

• History of committing dating violence
• Family conflict and aversive communication
• Witnessing violence between parents
• Witnessing violence in the community
• Believing it’s acceptable to resort to violence in dating relationships
• Acting physically aggressive toward peers, such as fighting or bullying
• Using alcohol or drugs
• Having problems in managing strong negative emotions such as anger, anxiety, or stress
• Having friends or parents who endorse violent relationships
• Parents’ use of harsh discipline

Risks for Being Abused
Adolescents who become victims of abuse share several common factors. The following factors increase the risk of being abused:

• History of dating violence
• Witness to violence among parents or violence in one’s community
• Friends who have experienced or are victims of dating abuse
• Low self-esteem and feelings of hopelessness among females
• Risky sexual behavior including having multiple sex partners and nonuse of condoms, especially among females

Parents please talk to your children if you feel there are some issues. Let them know that you are there for them.  If you have a friend that it being abused, speak up.  Many times, they may not realize the danger that they are in. Do not let them feel like they are alone with no one to turn to.

Domestic Violence and Pregnancy

Women in abusive relationships may hope pregnancy will reform an abusive partner. The sad reality, however, is that pregnancy is more likely to have the opposite effect: 1 in 6 abused women reports that her partner first became abusive during pregnancy. According to the Center for Disease Control, at least 4 to 8 percent of pregnant women—that's over 300,000 per year—report suffering abuse during pregnancy. Even more alarming: domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to American women between 15 and 44 and is estimated to be responsible for 20 to 25 percent of all hospital emergency room visits by women.

• Domestic violence has been identified as a prime cause of miscarriage or still-birth(1), and of maternal deaths during childbirth(2) .
• Legally, if a miscarriage is caused by abuse, the assailant can be charged under S.58 of the Offences against the Person Act, "using an instrument with intent to cause a miscarriage"(3) .
• If a baby is born prematurely as a result of an assault, and then dies, the assailant may be charged with manslaughter(4) .
• Within the six weeks following birth, 11 new mothers were known to have been murdered by their male partners during 2000-02, and 14% of all the women who died during or immediately after pregnancy (43 women) had reported domestic violence to a health professional during the pregnancy(5) .
• Between 4 and 9 women in every 100 are abused during their pregnancies and/or after the birth(6).
• 30% of domestic violence starts in pregnancy(7).
• 12% of the 378 women whose death was reported to the Confidential Enquiry on Maternal Deaths had voluntarily reported domestic violence to a healthcare professional during their pregnancy(8). None had routinely been asked about domestic violence so this is almost certainly an under-estimate.
• One study in the USA found a significant relationship between pregnancy, domestic violence, and suicide: pregnant women who attempt suicide are very likely to have been abused(9).
• Women receiving care on antenatal and postnatal wards were questioned in a study examining the prevalence of domestic violence and its associations with obstetric complications and psychological health. 23% of women had a lifetime experience of domestic violence, and 3% had experienced violence in the current pregnancy - probably an under-estimate(10). The effects can be cumulative and long-lasting; so abuse prior to the current pregnancy could also result in adverse effects for mother and child.
• Royal College of Midwives Position paper advocates recognition of abuse, documenting it, and giving woman information to make her own choices(11).
• Routine enquiry about domestic violence during antenatal booking is infrequent despite such enquiry being included in clinical practice recommendations and is made less frequently than any other aspect of social history taking(12).
• Midwives usually do not raise the subject of domestic violence, and women often feel "silenced" and unable to talk about it with their midwife(13).
• Routine enquiry about domestic violence in maternity settings is accepted by women, provided it is conducted in a safe confidential environment(14). A pilot project in Leeds found that 92% of women questioned were in favour of routine enquiry(15).
• Midwives approve in theory of routine questioning about domestic violence, and also broadly agree (81%) that it is their responsibility; but in practice, only about 60% are happy to do it(16). Practical and personal difficulties - including lack of time, staff shortages, and difficulty in obtaining sufficient privacy - were frequently cited(17).
• Training is essential in order to sustain routine questioning and ensure midwives are aware of how to respond to disclosure. Those midwives who - after training - do question women about domestic violence find benefits for themselves also(18).
• Healthcare professionals have a duty to record anything that might impact on the health of their patients including domestic violence.
• NSF (National Standard Framework) for Children, Young people and Maternity Services(19) includes points on identification of and response to domestic violence in pregnancy: women should be offered "a supportive environment and the opportunity to disclose" and maternity service staff should be "aware of the importance of domestic violence and competent in recognising the symptoms and presentations" and "able to make a sensitive enquiry" and "provide basic information" and referral to local services.

As a survivor of domestic violence during pregnancy, it can be very scary.  There people out there who will help you and your unborn child.  Please don't ever think you are alone in this.